Virtual Moxie - The Cure For The Common Virtual Assistance Practice

How to help clients with needs you can’t meet

I know a lot of VAs who aren’t struggling, and I meet my share of people who are. Some have even questioned whether “in this economy” they should lower their fees, or reduce the hours included in their minimum retainers.

I could be cavalier and say, “If you want clients who will pay what you ask, only talk with people who can afford your fee.” And I’d be spot on with that.

But that’s not very helpful to most people. And I genuinely want to help.

So first off—remember that when people don’t want to pay you what you’re worth, it doesn’t necessarily mean they don’t see your value, or that your fees are set inappropriately. It could (and probably does) mean that they have assigned a different value (or budget) for the work in their own minds—and your fee is simply outside that.

So, first and foremost, don’t let clients walking away because of “price” shake you. Instead, keep looking for clients who have assigned higher value to their work, and to the role you’ll play in their work.

Bit O’Moxie: Before you let clients walk away? Consider what else you might have that could be helpful.

For instance, do you have any resources you could offer the client that, given what he’s shared about his business, he might find useful? Have you created any info products (or are you an affiliate for any) he might find appealing? Do you know the perfect VA for him? Or do you know of a referral service that will take great care of him as he continues his search? Is there anything that you can share with him as he leaves you that will show you off to be someone who cares and is into giving?

Doing this--offering products—your own, or an affiliate product you genuinely believe might help—can allow you to still profit from the time you’ve spent with the client. Helping to find another VA is a kindness long remembered because you didn’t have to do it.

All of those things can help keep you in the client’s mind long after he’s moved on. You don’t want to close the door behind him—trust me--I’ve seen more than my share of clients move on from VAs whose fees were “too high,” then return with their proverbial tails between their legs when they don’t find what they really wanted elsewhere.

What can you offer, just because, that will be valuable and long-remembered?

You can't convince the unready

My friend, Toni Jo, and I went to an Abraham-Hicks workshop in DC, recently. And while there, I was reminded about something really important—something I’ve taught in one form or another for the past 12+ years about Attraction, although Abraham said it far more eloquently than I have in the past.

That same thing was further driven home for me today when my friend Marcia wrote to me and let me know she’d posted this open letter to VAs on her blog (read it, then come back).

I turned around and wrote this to Marcia:

It's a beautiful letter to them. And it echoes what I've been saying for nearly 13 years.

Obviously, some of them have listened. And the vast majority have not; they don't believe they "need" to. And so they continue to struggle, and struggle.

So, Miss Marcia...is there something we might do together, or in tandem, to get them to listen more?

And as soon as I’d sent that, I realized there was more I wanted to say, so I wrote again:

And, how do we get the client population to listen, too? They, if anything, are even more stubborn about refusing to believe that they don't get it.

And as I finished that paragraph, what Abraham had said plopped itself into my head, and I finished with this:

Oh, wait. I just answered my own question. We don't. We don't do it for either group. They don't get it because it's not time for them to get it. They're having wondrous experiences of not getting it. And to try to help them get it would be to try to deprive them of those experiences that, for whatever reason, they've decided they need to have, *and* it would be folly for us to spend our time trying to do what can't be done anyway.

We can only impact the people who are really ready, and the people who are right on the edge of readiness.

THOSE are the ones I want to reach.

And my reason for telling you this today? It's certainly not to convince you to be more active in learning from me. No; it’s to offer it all up as a Moxie-filled Bit O'Wisdom for you and for me (as I need to really heed this myself):

You, me, Marcia, governments, even God simply cannot (not even through billion-dollar ad campaigns launched by brilliant ad and marketing folks) bring those who aren’t ready, to something they aren’t ready for. It’s just impossible—not to mention frustrating. It’s most definitely an example of rowing upstream, with no good outcome. As my friend Wayne always says, “Never try to teach a pig to sing. It’s a waste of your time, and it tends to annoy the pig.”

So if you feel like you’re paddling upstream, spending time trying to talk people into understanding who you are, what you do, why Virtual Assistance is a kick-ass profession that makes gobs of difference for people, how you can help, why you’re worth the fee you charge—any conversation like those--just stop. You can’t move them beyond where they are, and, as I said in my email to Marcia, your working to do that deprives them of experiences they clearly are meant to have.

Instead, keep talking with people, but with a new mindset and focus. Now, walk away from those who aren’t ready (maybe offering them a site like AssistU or Virtual Moxie where they can learn more if and when they’re ready to, or send them to buy Marcia's fabulous e-book--but spending no more time on educating than that).

Talk more with those who are ready. You’ll recognize them because when you start to talk, their eyes won’t glaze over (you know the look I mean!), and instead, they’ll perk up and get super interested in hearing what you have to share. And you'll find that as they perk up, you'll feel more confident, and will be able to connect more deeply and share how you can make a difference in their lives and work from a position of strength. Which will have them connect more deeply and show more interest. Which will have you connect more deeply and be able to share more with more confidence. Which will have them connect more deeply and show more interest, you see?

As you talk, they’ll ask good questions that show that they get it (or are on the edge of getting it), and get you. They are the ones more likely to say, “Hell, yeah—when do we get started?” They're the ones who are going to focus on you and starting the co-creative process, rather than telling you all the reasons working with "someone like you" would never work for them. They are the ones who won’t try to make you justify yourself to make them feel better about what they are incapable of understanding.

Just be you. Feel great about you. Be happy with you. Do what fills you with joy—whether in business or in your personal life. And spend more time talking joyfully with people who are doing the same kinds of things.

Yours is not to convince. It’s never to convince. Yours is to simply feel great, love your life, follow that energy, notice the good people when they show up, connect, and see what happens.

I look forward to seeing what happens for you!

This is your world...

Today’s Bit O’Moxie comes from a magnet I look at every day. Gary Lew (someone I can find nothing interesting about, much to my chagrin) said:

This is your world. Shape it or someone else will.

I most often think of it with regard to two different things.

First, our profession. I’ve long said that our leaders’ disagreement about what we do and what we are is ultimately going to cause the public to define us—and we’re not going to like it. Even now, you see where coaches (the main culprits) often try to tell VAs what they SHOULD be doing to be great VAs. And I think it’s only going to get worse over time. Just sayin’. I mull it over and over. I have no specific words of wisdom about how to impact it any differently than I already do.

So it’s the second context that I really wanted to write to you about today, and that’s this:

The Universe abhors a vacuum. That’s why when you finish a big project (in business or life) and think that you’re finally going to have some breathing room, something shows up almost immediately to fill that space.

You can absolutely consciously create your world. Minute by minute, you have the power, and the choice. You can fill it just with what you want to fill it with. Say no to things that you don’t want so that you have more room for what you do (but remember to choose it or the Universe will fill it!). Ditch the crappy clients so you have room for the great ones.

But you do it, y’hear? Because if you don’t, it will get done for you—and you’re most certainly not going to like that as much as what you would have chosen for yourself.

What parts of your life and work do you shape, and what parts do you feel are being shaped for you without your input?